One-liners
- Thread starter AgentCooper
- Start date
You need a builder to dismantle the house. Move the sofa and then build a new house.
HomerJ
Author Level
URGENT POST!!
2 x England v Holland Tickets!
A mate has 2 tickets for the England v Netherlands game today
He paid £360 each, including flights but he didn't realise when he bought them months ago that it was going to be the same day as his wedding.
If you are interested, he is looking for someone to take his place.
It's at Walsall Registry Office, at 3pm. The bride's name is Tanya -- She's 5'6" and quite attractive.
A mate has 2 tickets for the England v Netherlands game today
He paid £360 each, including flights but he didn't realise when he bought them months ago that it was going to be the same day as his wedding.
If you are interested, he is looking for someone to take his place.
It's at Walsall Registry Office, at 3pm. The bride's name is Tanya -- She's 5'6" and quite attractive.
Martinr36
MOST VALUED CONTRIBUTOR
Dang, sounds as though I missed out there, mind you where was @HomerJ at 3, I'm sure there's a reason he posted this after 3URGENT POST!!
2 x England v Holland Tickets!
A mate has 2 tickets for the England v Netherlands game today
He paid £360 each, including flights but he didn't realise when he bought them months ago that it was going to be the same day as his wedding.
If you are interested, he is looking for someone to take his place.
It's at Walsall Registry Office, at 3pm. The bride's name is Tanya -- She's 5'6" and quite attractive.
HomerJ
Author Level
Martinr36
MOST VALUED CONTRIBUTOR
I just knew it..........
HomerJ
Author Level
even saw dave the saudi arabian carpet cleaner,
must say, does a good job,
you can tell hes the best cleaner in dammam
HomerJ
Author Level
Last edited:
Martinr36
MOST VALUED CONTRIBUTOR
Three old Grandmas were sitting on a bench outside the nursing home when an old Grandpa walked by.
One of the old Grandmas yelled out, 'Hey, we bet we can tell exactly how old you are!'
The old man said, 'There is no way you can guess my age!’
One of the Grandmas said, 'Sure we can! Just drop your pants and undershorts and we can tell your exact age.'
Embarrassed, but anxious to prove they couldn't do it, he dropped his drawers.
The Grandmas asked him to first turn around a couple of times and then jump up and down several times.
Determined to prove them wrong, he did it.
Then they all said in unison, 'You're 87-years-old!'
Standing with his pants down around his ankles, the old gent asked, 'How in the world did you guess my age?'
Slapping their knees, high-fiving and grinning from ear to ear, the three old ladies happily crowed.....
'We were at your birthday party yesterday.' 😅😅😅😅
One of the old Grandmas yelled out, 'Hey, we bet we can tell exactly how old you are!'
The old man said, 'There is no way you can guess my age!’
One of the Grandmas said, 'Sure we can! Just drop your pants and undershorts and we can tell your exact age.'
Embarrassed, but anxious to prove they couldn't do it, he dropped his drawers.
The Grandmas asked him to first turn around a couple of times and then jump up and down several times.
Determined to prove them wrong, he did it.
Then they all said in unison, 'You're 87-years-old!'
Standing with his pants down around his ankles, the old gent asked, 'How in the world did you guess my age?'
Slapping their knees, high-fiving and grinning from ear to ear, the three old ladies happily crowed.....
'We were at your birthday party yesterday.' 😅😅😅😅
HomerJ
Author Level
its rained so much everyones got a swimming pool in there back garden
SpyderTracks
We love you Ukraine
Mine is a toilet I think
HomerJ
Author Level
i suppose for a spyder its looks like a swimming pool
SpyderTracks
We love you Ukraine
I feel I may have missed something worthwhile!!!
HomerJ
Author Level
I feel I may have missed something worthwhile!!!
homer wants to know more